


And That’s How We Met

by Freezeurbrain



Category: Dear Evan Hansen - Pasek & Paul/Levenson
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Everybody Lives, Funny, Inspired By Tumblr, Kleinsen, Nobody is Dead, Old school websites, These kids need happiness, high school idiocy, i gave it to em, jared was a crime master at seven
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-29
Updated: 2019-08-29
Packaged: 2020-09-29 15:11:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20438096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Freezeurbrain/pseuds/Freezeurbrain
Summary: A lunchtime conversation stirs up some of Jared’s old criminal activities.(Inspired by this post: https://eyedeleter.tumblr.com/post/187337950700/funny-story)





	And That’s How We Met

“Did you guys ever play Club Penguin?” The question Alana asked one day over lunch seemed quite random, but then again, they were high schoolers. When you’d seen an anti-vaping poster of an alien holding a vape pod that said “We don’t Juul in this school”, a question about Club Penguin was just normal everyday banter. 

“Nah.” Jared shook his head. “Never really liked it much.” 

Zoe rolled her eyes. “Well, you had no childhood. I played it almost every day. I remember begging my mom to buy a membership because I wanted to get a bunch of different-colored Fluffles or whatever they were called.”

Connor scoffed. “They were _Puffles_, you uncultured swine.”

“Well excuse me, Connor.” 

“I did have a childhood.” Jared said. “For your information, I played this thing called Nicktropolis religiously.”

“Nicktropolis?” Connor raised an eyebrow. “I think I remember that.” 

Jared chuckled. “It’s actually a pretty funny story- you know, since the site was mostly catered to kids, they obviously didn’t expect all their users to remember their passwords all the time. So they had these ‘security question’ things you could set if you forgot your password, and if you got it right, it would tell you your password. And one of these was ‘What is your eye color?’” 

“That is the dumbest possible security question I have ever heard of.” Connor said. 

“I know. And being a seven-year-old, I was obviously focused on the important things in life, right?” Jared was getting into this story now. “So I would take my avatar and go to some of the locations around Nicktropolis and write down random usernames of people that were also there. Then, I’d log out and type in the usernames, and see which of those usernames had the security question ‘what is your eye color?’ It was a lot of them, since it was easy to remember and we were all, like, seven.” 

“I’m getting a bad feeling from this.” Zoe’s eyes widened, and Jared laughed.

“So I’d try either brown, green, or blue, and I would always get in, because what other color is a seven year old going to use to describe their eyes? So then, I’d go to that person’s house and send all of their furniture to my own account, and if I didn’t want it, I’d sell it for virtual money.” Jared finished his story with a dramatic flourish. “And that’s how I became a criminal mastermind at the age of seven.”

“Wait one second.” Evan’s eyes widened. “Wait just one second. I used to play Nicktropolis all the time! And then one day I logged on and all the decorations in my house were missing! At the time I thought it was a glitch in the game or something and I cried for like three hours, but-“ he turned to Jared. “Did you rob me?” 

Jared’s eyes widened. “Wait, what was your username?”

“I don’t know, but my house did have a lot of trees in it because that was right around the time I started getting into botany.” Evan said.

“No way.” Jared said, “I remember I got into this one house and it was literally just trees!” 

“Holy shit, you robbed your boyfriend before you even met him!” Connor laughed, slamming a fist down onto the table. “Wow, that is _priceless_!” 

“No, we knew each other by that point.” Evan said, “Which means that he unknowingly robbed his then-friend!” 

“Can I interest you in reparations?” Jared asked, holding his hands up into the air.

“Only if they’re in the form of pretzels.” Evan laughed, gesturing to the bag of Snyder’s pretzels on Jared’s lunch tray. 

Jared sighed. “You drive a hard bargain, Acorn.” 

“You know, just for that, can I have your fruit gummies, too?”


End file.
